But this lack of action could soon be no more, all thanks to the ‘Cinderella rule’.
If you’re someone who is having less sex because you’re too tired at night after cramming your day with chores, hobbies and fun, then you and your partner may benefit from something experts are calling the ‘Cinderella Rule’.
What is the ‘Cinderella Rule’ when it comes to sex?
As first detailed by Metro, the Cinderella Rule is a so-called cut-off point in your head when intimacy will no longer be on the cards.
The publication reported that by putting a time limit on sex, you will never have to be exhausted in the morning, and you’ll still be able to complete your routine without having to compromise.
Alice Giddings, who hosts podcast Just Between Us with Diana Vickers, said her ‘sex cut-off time’ was 10.30pm.
Reasoning why, she wrote: “This is when it’ll be lights out and off to snoozeville. This means my cut-off for intimacy starts is 10.10pm latest.”
The sex and relationships reporter claimed having a designated sex window can help you and your partner to connect when you’re going through a ‘particularly busy period’, adding: “There’s also something about the anticipation that makes it quite exciting.”
People are learning about the ‘Cinderella Rule’ for the first time
Giddings’ advice came about after hearing from listener Mia on the Just Between Us podcast.
Mia, a business owner who also cared for two elderly relatives, said: “I live with people that require a lot of attention and it’s very consuming.
“I don’t have the time or mental ability [for sex]. I work very long hours and struggle to switch from super sleepy to sexual.”
Upon learning about the ‘Cinderella Rule’ for the first time, Mia told the co-hosts: “Remembering to find these moments of connection in the mundane where we can flirt a little if we pass each other in the kitchen, would make it so much easier to switch your mindset and mood.”
What are experts saying about scheduling sex?
Last year, The Knot reported that only 2 percent of dating individuals are scheduling sex with their partners. Meanwhile, 14 percent of married couples admitted they routinely stick the deed in their Google Calendars.
One woman who believes scheduling sex is a good thing is Heather McPherson of Respark Therapy, PLLC.
She told The Knot: “Scheduling sex is like adding a sprinkle of intention and excitement to your relationship. It’s all about having a blast while keeping your bond strong and steamy.”
Apparently, there are some major benefits too, including improving communication, boosting intimacy and having the option to build anticipation through spicy texts and teasing.
“Together, you can create the mental headspace for sexual possibilities,” said Sally Valentine, founder of Life Coaching and Therapy.